How to choose funeral songs

Traditional hymns were once the only songs to be heard at a funeral, but as services have become more personal, the range of songs played and sung at funerals is almost as wide as the musical tastes of the population.

This is reflected regularly in funeral song charts, where 'Amazing Grace' and 'The Old Rugged Cross' have given way to more modern tracks sung by artists from well-loved crooners like Frank Sinatra to current chart toppers like Ed Sheeran.

Unlimited song choice

Add in the power of technology, with digital music libraries offering hundreds of thousands of tracks, and the choice of songs available to play at a funeral is almost limitless.

This can make choosing the perfect funeral songs a challenge, especially if no instructions have been left. Your task may be easier if your loved one had a favourite song, or even a favourite singer, but it's common to choose more than one song for a funeral service so you may have to think beyond obvious favourites.

When choosing funeral songs, consider the broader musical taste of the deceased. Take a look at their CD collection or even the playlists on their music streaming service.

Musical memories

It's important to reflect the musical preferences of the deceased, but you should also think about the congregation. Talk to family and friends about the songs that remind them of your loved one. Maybe they remember them singing them, or they just enjoyed listening to them.

Also be aware that the songs you choose may come to remind members of the congregation of their loss. Songs that may be heard regularly at public events - 'Auld Lang Syne', for example - may be difficult for friends and family to hear for a while. Even contemporary pop songs can bring back strong memories of the funeral.

Setting the tone

Songs can really set the tone for the funeral service, and having different types of song at different parts of the funeral can help the congregation move through the various stages of the service.

It's common to have a song played while the coffin enters the funeral venue, setting the mood for the coming service. In celebration of life services, this might be a more lively and upbeat song than what might be played at a more traditional funeral.

At many funerals, there's a song to be played mid-way through the service. This is often sung by the congregation and, if it's to be sung, should be familiar to most people and easy to sing. The final song, to be played when mourners are leaving the venue, is frequently more uplifting, helping mourners to leave feeling a little more positive.

It's really important to listen all the way through to the songs that you choose to have at the funeral you are arranging. You may think that you are familiar with the lyrics, but it's important to double check - just a couple of inappropriate lyrics could have a very negative impact on the day. Do a Google search if you're unsure.

Also resist the temptation to be funny, unless you've been left strict instructions. You may think it's amusing to play 'Highway to Hell' at the funeral, but it's better to avoid offence.

Available songs

There are companies that provide access to digital music libraries for funeral services at many venues, allowing families to search for songs by specific singers. If you're in any doubt about the availability of the songs you'd like at the funeral you're arranging, speak with your local funeral director. They'll be able to tell you about the set up at the funeral venue you're using and make suggestions based on first-hand experience.